I've been relatively quiet for the last month while navigating some major transitions in my personal life. It's forced me to slow down, take a breather and check back into how I'm showing up in the world.
It all started with a very spur of the moment trip to Santa Fe for a women's retreat. I decided at approximately 10:00pm on a Thursday that I NEEDED this, and was boarding a flight the next morning at 6:30am. (I've always been a lead with the heart type of person.)
I was hit with all sorts of a-ha moments, life-altering realizations, massive breakthroughs and lots of tears. It turns out I had been trying to do this little thing called life on my own for quite some time. I started believing I had to have everything figured out. I stopped reaching out for support, I stopped listening when my soul would tell me that something was no longer aligned with the person I was becoming or the new direction in life that I was being drawn towards.
I was reminded of the very important lesson that we all are enough, we are all powerful, we are all WHOLE - exactly as we are, in this very moment.
Simply put, this retreat cracked me open. When I returned back to reality, I began the process of acknowledging, accepting and making the difficult changes in my life that I knew I needed to make. (Daily work-in-progress, while new a-ha moments continue to role in)
After a rather (and gratefully so) full 2017, I noticed that when - out of balance - I'd fall back into the unhealthy (and very unsustainable) tendencies I experienced in my corporate career of overworking until burnout, neglecting time off and self-care and focusing on external achievements rather than what felt internally nourishing.
I started relying on the opinion's of others to tell me the answers to questions that only I, myself, could answer.
I had built my business up to a point where I got into a go, go, go mode - without ever slowing down and tuning in to whether or not this way of "doing things" still felt aligned for me.
I realized that I was in a relationship where I had begun to willingly sacrifice things that were important to me, and at some point I stopped listening to what my heart had already known, for quite some time.
In an effort to try to be available all of the time to everyone around me, I started to neglect being truly there, for myself.
What it all made me realize was that the most important questions we can ask ourselves at every given moment is:
Does this *truly* feel right for me, in this specific moment?
Does this *truly* align with the person I want to be, and the life that I want to live?"
If it doesn't, you have the power to choose something different, and that's the beauty of this world we live in.
We have the power to choose something different, new and more aligned, every single day.
So I've been in hibernation mode. Being silent. Healing. Grieving. Processing. Detoxing. Decluttering. Creating space for new projects, ideas and a direction that feels truly aligned with the person I want to be and the life I want to live.
And lastly, if you have been feeling uncertain, experiencing self-doubt or questioning the way you've been doing things or the way you've been showing up in the world, then let me reassure you that this is a very, very good thing.
It means you're growing, you're evolving and you're getting one step closer to the most authentic version of yourself.
And although it can be freaking painful to navigate through those big transitions, it can feel pretty damn liberating as well.
So, if you find yourself navigating through your own transitions, I would love for you to share! If there was one key takeaway from my retreat, it was the power and healing that occurs when you give yourself permission to speak your truth in a safe space and in the presence of someone who wants you to succeed.
So much love & gratitude for you being here,